Monday, April 22, 2002
The Sox are two games in first. I will not let myself hope.... I will not... I will not.... it's only April.
This is pretty much how William Jennings Bryan felt after his 3rd Presidential nomination.
(It was 1908. He lost to Taft.)
This is pretty much how William Jennings Bryan felt after his 3rd Presidential nomination.
(It was 1908. He lost to Taft.)
Wednesday, April 17, 2002
Giambi is a total washout. He has to grow that goatee back. Yeah, like the Yanks NEEDED saving. I wonder is his wife still wants to have Giambi-babies?
I really do like Roger Clemens, though.
I really do like Roger Clemens, though.
Thursday, April 11, 2002
Abraham Lincoln grew up in a log cabin. So what? So did Millard Fillmore! The guy couldn't even get nominated again after serving as president for two years. And his Secretary of State was frickin' Daniel Webster!
Try to talk to people about this and they change the subject. That's why you gotta have three subjects.
Try to talk to people about this and they change the subject. That's why you gotta have three subjects.
List of actors who wore rugs:
Ray Milland (Academy Award--The Lost Weekend)
Jimmy Stewart (Academy award for the Philadelphia Story)
Sean Connery (Oscar for The Untouchables)
William Shatner (who once presented an Academy Award with Star Trek the motion picture "star" Persis Khembata)
Ray Milland (Academy Award--The Lost Weekend)
Jimmy Stewart (Academy award for the Philadelphia Story)
Sean Connery (Oscar for The Untouchables)
William Shatner (who once presented an Academy Award with Star Trek the motion picture "star" Persis Khembata)
Tuesday, April 09, 2002
There's a movie about John Nash who went insane and couldn't even work, and yet no one has done a movie about WILLIAM SEWARD???
Well, Pedro figured that shitting the bed once was all he needed for the time being. But even six shutout innings weren't enough to get his ERA down below 7.00! You'll notice that last week we Sox fans were all blaming it on his rotator cuff. But no one's going around this week saying "Geez, did you see the rotator cuff action on that guy? That was excellent!" The Best Editing Oscar in 1951 went to William Hornbeck for "A Place in the Sun."
Monday, April 08, 2002
So now Ewan MacGregor says he was disappointed by Episode I. Say what you want but Peter "Grand Moff Tarkin" Cushing was at least loyal. Denis Lawson and Jeremy Sinden were a publicist's DREAM! And by this point, making fun of Episode I is as pointless a mission as Chewie and Han Solo trying to get home to the Wookie planet so they can celebrate Lifeday.
Sunday, April 07, 2002
Fuck salad.
Friday, April 05, 2002
Here's a list I'm working on of ex Red Sox named Rudy Pemberton:
Rudy Pemberton
Rudy Pemberton
Rudy Pemberton
I'm sure there are a few others I'm missing.
Rudy Pemberton
Rudy Pemberton
Rudy Pemberton
I'm sure there are a few others I'm missing.
Can anyone figure out these damn electric can openers? Half the instructions are in CHINESE. I'll have to call Ted.
What's wrong with a guy rubbing down his friend's SPORTS HERNIA?
Who the hell decided we need to remake "Roller Ball"???? Was there even a demand for one "Roller Ball"?
It brings me back to a few years ago, when there were TWO, count 'em TWO Columbus movies.
Or even further when there was John Adams, then John Quincy Adams.
It brings me back to a few years ago, when there were TWO, count 'em TWO Columbus movies.
Or even further when there was John Adams, then John Quincy Adams.
Damn, another present from Ted, another set of those Chinese metal balls your roll around in your hand. I feel like Blofeld from the Bond pictures. Not the Charles Gray Blofeld, but the Donald Pleasance Blofeld. Ever notice how Donald Pleasance in the "Halloween" movies always pronounced "evil" with three syllables? "Eee-vee-ull."
Aaron Burr was 5'4".
Aaron Burr was 5'4".
Thursday, April 04, 2002
355 more days until the 75th annual Academy Awards...
Postponed. Great. three days into the season, and we're a already a game and a half back. Behind the DEVIL RAYS! I mean, that's like George C. Scott chasing Walter Matthau in the race for the '71 Best Actor. I mean, NEITHER one was gonna win it, but c'mon - Walter Matthau? For "Kotch!?" [Gene Hackman took it of course. "French Connection. But I digress] Devil Rays!?
Wednesday, April 03, 2002
False alarm, still delayed.
A RAIN DELAY? I'll take it, considering the Sox have Dustin Hermanson on the mound (61-61 lifetime, with a 4.22 ERA - not shitty, but he's no Pedro. Not that PEDRO was Pedro this weekend. Fuck! Where's the friggin' close parentheses on this thing? Dammit! Oh, wait -). Wait - it's back on.
Jeesus, did I hit the button yet? This is worse than "Milk Money." Seriously. Where's "reply all?"
What the hell? Lookit, I don't know what any of this is. Hello? Is this the email?
